Importance of negation in life

When we read a book or listen to a person our mind tries to formulate what we read or listened from others. The result of this formulation is we will say to ourselves I must be like this from now onwards. If we observe closely when I say I must be like this it leads to conflict, effort and struggle to become something which you are not already. If you are learning instead of saying I must, the change is effortless, you feel happy when you comes out of a conclusion, idea, concept and belief which you are carrying with out proper investigation, so self negation makes you stronger not self improvement. Self negation means unconditioning your mind, coming out of narrow and limited thinking. Doubting questioning is intelligence not believing.